Three years ago today we were logged in with the CCAA to adopt a little girl from China. Three years. We started the adoption process about six months prior to that. I can't believe how long ago that was. So much has happened... Luca has doubled in age, we have a dog, we have a new sister in law, we have two new nieces, I have a new job... so much has changed. If we were still waiting for a referral we would still have YEARS of waiting ahead of us. It's insane. The CCAA is currently giving referrals to family's logged in in April 2006. That means they have a full year's worth of dates in line in front of us. Being that the CCAA is only getting through 2-3 months of log in dates per year... well it could be worst case 6 years before we would get a referral. I'm not saying that is what is going to happen... I'm just saying if the current trend of the past two years holds true then it will be about that long. Lots of people are dropping out of the program though so that may speed things up a bit. Whatever the case we would be waiting a very long time after already waiting a very long time. NOT THE 18 - 24 MONTHS WE THOUGHT WE WOULD BE WAITING.
Anyway, this date no longer brings me pain and holds no real significance in my life anymore. I have the light of my life and she was worth all of it. Every tear, every bit of energy, every prayer, everything.
My heart does break though for the thousands of families still waiting. Not all families have the opportunity to switch countries like we did. They are just stuck waiting. All their hopes and dreams on hold. Although my own personal pain of the wait has lifted... I will never forget what it was like. It makes me tear up right now just typing this. The Sadness, the obsessing, the worry, the frustration, the gloom, the anger. It is something that unless you have experienced it, you never really know what it's like.
For those still waiting, I know that there really are no words that will ease your pain. Just want you to know you are in my thoughts and prayers.