This sure has been a different summer. It seems to be flying by but it also seems like we haven't done much. We have taken a couple of trip up north but day to day... we are kind of stuck. Having a baby at home sure changes things. Usually the boys and I have a jam packed schedule... swimming, nature trails, library, picnics, play dates, etc. This summer I find it difficult to do much at all. Our beloved trips to the library where we could spend hours reading and browsing have turned into mad grab and go dashes. Let's just say that Eden isn't exactly a quiet child. Swimming and spending time outside need to be scheduled around naps/lunch/and Eden's daily mood. Trips to the movies or shopping need to be scheduled prior with a babysitter. Soooo most days are spent at home. It is just so much work to prepare and take her places. She HATES her stroller and has only fell asleep in it once (our trip to the zoo.) Most of the time she spends shriek screaming to get out. She has figured out how to get out of her stroller even with the five point harness. She can also wiggle out of a shopping cart belt in two second flat (all the while screaming and people staring.) My sister and I have dubbed her the new David Blaine. She would rather be carried but once she gets tired of being in the Ergo she will scratch, pull my hair and bite me in order to get down... and once you do let her down she refuses to hold your hand or walk in whatever direction your would like her to. My independent shrieking contortionist. It is out of control. I am not saying that she does this EVERY time we go out... but it has happened enough to make me really evaluate if a particular trip is worth the risk. Keep in mind too that all the while I also have a very active/distractable/no-fear six year old that I can't take my eyes off of for a second. Ugh.
I am board. My boys are board.
At the same time we have made such strides in attachment this summer. I love not working and being able to spend so much time with Eden (and my boys.) I feel like she has bonded so much more with me. It isn't until she starts doing things that she hasn't done before that I really see how far we have come. She is so much more affectionate with me now. She now "melts" into me when I hold her and will lay her head on my shoulder. I am able to calm and soothe her much more quickly now as well. When I was working it seemed that the minute I would walk in the door she would start to fuss. My mom would say, "she has been good all day, so happy, she is such an easy baby." The total opposite of what she would be like for me. I HATED it. Now that I am home with her I can see that from about 5:00 - 8:00 she is just fussy. I hate that I am not home during her happy hours of the day while I am working. I am DREADING going back to work. I worry that all the progress she has made with me is going to disappear. I worry about yet another change for her.
We have about one month left of summer vacation. Today we have a trip to the library planned after Eden wakes from her nap. We have our books already requested and on hold (via the library website) so that we can just drop off the old and grab the new if we need to. :) We will just have to see.